Future Mistakes
by xrightwhereitbelongs
Summary: A girl tormented by visions knows Constantine can help her but along the way she finds out the terrible mistakes she had yet to make. Originally know as Finding Constantine.
1. Hell on Earth

**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything.  
**Summary:** A girl tormented by visions knows Constantine can help her all she has to do is find him and convince him to help. Easier said than done!  
**Note:** The film never happened.

**Chapter 1. Hell on Earth**

I woke panting deeply distressed.  
Constantine, the word echoed in my mind.  
I had been having the same dream, the same nightmare over and over for months.  
I shakily walked over to the mirror examining my reflection.  
Puffy red eyes lined with deep dark bags. My skin was deathly pale.  
I just wasn't the person I used to be.  
I walked into the shower dropping my cloths and standing in the cool water refreshing my sleeping skin.  
It was the same dream I had been having over and over.  
Flames. I could feel the heat from the flames that surrounded me. I felt pain like my heart was being ripped out. Then I saw him standing staring at me. He stood tall wearing a black suite staring straight at me. Then I heard it. Constantine. It was a whisper but I heard it clear as day.  
Turning the water off I grabbed a towel dressed quickly and headed for work.

I stepped out into a sheet of icy cold rain huge droplets pelting my delicate form.  
It didn't take me long to flag down a cab. I got in ready to utter the dreaded words that would take me to the boredom of work but I stop. If I don't find out who this guy is soon I'll go insane. No sleep, I'm not eating, hardly breathing any more. No, not work. Not today.  
"The library please"  
And we're off. The cab makes its way through LA passing people, other cabs the general LA scene.  
I take a shaky breath everything was a chore for me these days.  
My life is far from what you would call normal but at one point I could go to sleep without waking up in a cold sweat feeling even more tired than what I had the previous day.  
The Cab stopped inches in front of the main door.  
I got out into the pouring rain for a second time.  
Rows and rows of books greeted my eyes. Where should I start? Hell? I didn't have the faintest idea.  
Then I heard it. Constantine. That name. I looked towards two figures standing at the back. A man in a black suite. I started walking towards him. Finally he turned and I saw him. The man from my dream.  
He looked right at me pausing for only a second before he walked away as if I had never been there.  
"STOP!" I shouted.  
He continued towards the door.  
"Constantine"  
Nothing I ran towards him he didn't stop. A man in a cab jumped out calling for him. He continued on in the rain coughing violently.  
I couldn't get to him. "Damn it!" I shouted.  
The man next to the cab looked towards me. YES! I thought this was my chance.  
"Excuse me"  
He looked at me. Pretty good looking but the same sadness in his eyes. The sadness I saw in my own.  
"What?" He asked.  
"I was wondering if you could tell me where that man lives. Constantine"  
He looked at me. Fuck. Why had I just said that? This was LA he wasn't going to tell me jack.  
"Hey lady that's none of your business"  
I closed my eyes picturing the flames around me and those eyes. His eyes where so sad.  
"Please. I need to meet him!" I begged closing my eyes.  
No peace. There was no rest for me. These images that had haunted me all my life. People trapped in between this world and the next. Sadness and despair. It was so draining I had no life of my own. I stood swaying slightly my eyes closed, soaked to the bone. Tears ran slowly down my cheeks mingling with the rain. My life had been so tragic. My sister was murdered when we were little. My mother died soon after unable to go on. My father... There was nothing to say about my father. I had loved him and he was all I had left. He started drinking, beating on me. Then I got the visions. My sister and mother in flames. I saw my sister's murderer, I saw bad horrible people and there was nothing I could do. I lived a life of pain and misery. Then one day he was gone. My father had left me alone, plagued with these distraught images.  
I gave in on everyone and everything.  
The cool clean blades cut into the soft skin of my wrists and darkness overcame me.  
I had never imaged hell. I had never thought of it but suddenly I was there. It tore me apart it took every tiny piece of me and... I died over and over in flames and hatred and self loathing. I wouldn't wish that on anyone. I had been dead three minutes but they brought me back. That's when I knew what I saw was real. I saw darker, deeper thing and I knew one day, maybe soon maybe years away, I knew one day I would be returning to that treacherous place.  
My eyes snapped open as I felt myself falling. I was brought back to reality by the cab driver I had been talking to moments before. His eyes were concerned. I hadn't seen anyone look concerned for me, not since my mother had died.  
"Are you okay"  
I shook my head.  
"Please I need to speak to Constanine"  
He nodded opening the door for me and motioning for me in get inside.  
We drove quietly towards the rough side of town. I sad with my eyes closed massaging my temples attempting to release the pressure that had been building due to fatigue. When the cab stopped and the man got out I remained. This was all so strange. What if he didn't know what I was talking about?  
Finally the man opened the door and helped me out.  
"I'm Chas and his name is John Constantine. Be nice. He's got social issues so don't push him. Okay"  
I barley nodded the pressure in my head was ready to explode images ran through my head of a small boy in flames calling towards me unable to reach me.

"John. Someone to see you"  
He turned again looking at me only for a moment before turning away.  
"What do you want"  
"I... I've been having dreams. Dark dreams of flames and pain. I saw you, you can help me. I can't sleep. Look I don't know who you are but I can't do this any more." I said collapsing to the floor.  
The pain was at breaking point. My whole body felt on fire, my eyes glazed over and I was there.

_"You have to help me." The little boy sobbed.  
"I want to go home"  
I stared into the little boy's eyes in the middle of a ring of fire.They were so near now the demons that haunted my existence, the demons waiting for my return.  
"PLEASE!" He cried.  
"I...I can't" I whispered_

I sat bolt upright shaking wishing away the new flood of pain that washed over me.  
The tears started again, my whole body shook with the sobs as I held my aching head.  
"John... I need your help."


	2. Hell again

I could see in his eyes he knew what I was talking about. "Who are you?" He asked quietly.  
"My name is Sarah. I know that you understand what I'm going through. I can see it in your eyes. I have visions I see the damned and I help them. My life is one fucking thing after the other. I'm barely surviving. Lately I've been having the same dream of you. I know it means something you have to help me"  
"What happened just there?" He asked.  
"What? When I fell"  
He nodded.  
"I don't know. I had a vision, but it wasn't just a vision it seemed like so much more. There was a little boy he needs me... I can't help him"  
"Why?" He questioned.  
"LOOK AT ME!" I screamed.  
"I'm a mess. I haven't slept properly in months I barely eat, my head fells as if it's going to explode, I can't concentrate and I can scarcely breathe." I was so messed up. So upset I was tired and I was exhausted physically and mentally.  
"You want something to eat." Chas asked.  
I nodded.  
"What age are you, you don't look any older than Chas here." John questioned.  
I laughed age. I had lived an eternity in the space of my small life.  
"I'm 19. I'm no kid. I've survived on my own for 3 years. I've lived through hell, literally"  
John raised an eyebrow curious of what I had meant.  
"I slit my wrists, I was dead for three minutes I'm damned just like every god damn idiot I save from that place"  
He looked away.  
"Join the club sweet heart"  
It was my time to be curious this strong man in front of me had killed himself, unbelievable.  
Chas returned with a sandwich that a gratefully took. I hadn't eaten in so long.  
I gave them my background knowledge of hell, demon's etc. I told them of my past all the while I fought off my increasing headache.  
"Why do you get those headaches?" Chas asked melting me with his concern.  
I shrugged the truth was I didn't know. I had been fine before but now I was in constant pain.  
"You should get that checked out you never know, hell it turned out my cough was lung cancer" John laughed taking a drag of his cigarette.  
I closed my eyes the little boy's eyes boring into mine. He needed me and I was sitting here eating a god damn fucking sandwich!  
"I need to go! I said clumsily rising to my feet.  
"Hey, I though you needed my help"  
I nodded.  
"I do, but I need to save that boy"  
John looked at me confusion taking over his clean cut features.  
"I don't understand. You want to help these people yet your still damned to hell? Haven't you repented"  
I sighed. If only it were that simple.  
"You know as well as I do its not that simple. I killed myself and I wanted to die! I wanted it all to end. I didn't want hell or heaven I wanted the darkness of nothing! I still want that John"  
"You still want to die even though you know your going down"  
I nodded. "I don't want to go to hell but I can't stay here its driving me insane"  
Constantine. The word echoed in my mind. I turned towards Chas smiling. "So what's your story?" I asked.  
He laughed. Looking intently into my eyes.  
"I don't have a story"  
"Look Sarah if you want my help then let's do this." John cut in.  
I sighed, a heavy sigh my life was such a burden. Closing my eyes yet again I saw the flames my headache was coming back again not as strong as before but slowly building.  
I nodded slightly opening my eyes.  
"Okay John lets do this then. Where do we start"  
"You have to go back. Find out who the kid is." He said more to himself than to me.  
The though of going back to that place was more than I could handle, I flashed back to the very first time I had entered the fiery gates of hell. 

_I sat alone in my empty home. My own blood slowly covering the hard wooden floor. I was so very alone the world was against me my mother father and sister had all left me alone with these images these visions in my head taking whatever sanity I had left. I felt myself drain of everything the pain in my wrists numbed, blackness slowly covered my eyes as I slowly slipped away.  
I hadn't expected fluffy white clouds or harps playing I had only wanted darkness a quiet place to be but what I got was far from that.  
All those people in so much pain. Death and destruction red flames this was hell. I was paying for my sins. I was ripped apart over and over, if I though I had felt pain before I was so wrong it was unbearable I died over and over what was only three minutes seemed like an eternity.  
I woke in hospital still alive yet dead inside._

I opened my eye's as Chas shook me slightly.  
"Are you okay?" He asked.  
"You want me to go back?" I asked John.  
"Fine lets do this thing!" The truth was I was terrified. I hadn't been there in so long, my visions were bad enough but to be there, I feared it was more than I could handle.  
Chas gave me a reassuring smile, however his smile would bring me no comfort in hell.

John and I stood in the half filled bath tub holding hands. He had never tried crossing over with another person before so this was a little tricky.  
We emerged together holding hands on the plane of hell. I forgot how horrible this place was. The smell, the screams... I felt as if I had gone back in time.  
There he was. The same little boy in chains tears in his eyes surrounded by soldier demons heading straight for him.  
"What's your name kid?" John shouted. Bad move.  
The same words were whispered time and time again. Constantine. There wasn't a soul in hell who wasn't aware of his presence.  
The little boy looked so sad. He looked right through Constantine and straight at me.  
"Mommy"  
In the blink of an eye I was lying on the floor coughing madly unable to breathe or even think.  
My son was in hell?


	3. Truth

_sorry this one is a little short i've no idea where to go with this story i'll try and think up some more ideas soon_

"You have a kid? You didn't tell me, how is..." John questioned.  
I shook my head in total disbelieve. I didn't have a son I never had, but that boy he just... Reminded me of myself like he was a part of me like he was my son, but I knew that was impossible.  
"No, I don't I don't have a son." I said shaking my head, this wasn't real.  
"He thinks you're his mother why would he think that?" Constantine asked taking out a cigarette and lighting it.  
"I don't know." I was lost for words. I needed to know who he was and why he thought I was his mom.  
"John I need to know who he is!" I begged.  
"Midnite" John muttered while nodding his head slightly.  
Chas suddenly stood up abruptly.  
"Midnite? You mean the papa Midnite"  
Constantine rolled his eyes got up and left the room.  
"Wow you must be really freaked by this." Chas said.  
I nodded, I had to admit I was worried what was going on.  
"Yeah, I know I don't have a son but he seemed so familiar"  
Chas nodded looking intently into my eyes. He was so beautiful. He smiled got up and headed for the door brushing passed me ever so slightly.  
My head exploded, I let up an ear spitting scream as I fell to the floor, I felt Chas catch me before I hit my head but I could barely breathe. It felt as though someone had their hand in my brain and was wiggling about. Tears cascaded down my pale lifeless face the pain was so unbearable I didn't even notice I was still screaming. My nose began to bleed and felt like I was about to die I was in so much pain. I felt another pair of hands grasp me, Constantine no doubt. I couldn't see my eyes were so blurred with tears.  
"Sarah...you...need...911..." He seemed so far away I couldn't hear.  
I lay sobbing until the pain subsided enough for me to stop. I blinked trying to hold the pain at bay. I looked desperately in John's eyes willing him to help me, to stop the pain.  
My eyes rolled back into my head as the pain took over and I faded into an uneasy fit of blackness.

"Why can't you care?" He asked me.  
I was standing again in the depths of hell with my supposed son, confused.  
"You're not my son"  
His eyes filled with tears and I saw the pain he was feeling.  
"How can you say that mommy, I love you, daddy would help"  
I looked at the little boy who felt so familiar yet so strange.  
"What's your name? Who is your dad and why do you think I'm your mom"  
He smiled looking carefully at me wondering what to say.  
"I'm Danny Kramer and my daddy is Chas Kramer and you're my mommy"  
I looked in total disbelief unable to process the information I had been given.  
"Mommy you must remember me. Daddy went to Heaven and I'm being punished for your sins please mommy go to daddy ask him about the Trimer's Rock"

I woke in a hospital room white walls, white sheet, white everything it was creepy.  
I turned my head slightly to see John and Chas talking quietly.  
"Trimer's Rock, I need to know what Trimer's Rock is." I gasped.  
They both turned towards me Chas looked intently into my eyes and John just looked worried.  
"Trimer's Rock? I've heard of that. It lets to plains to overlap and exist as one. Umm like the future Earth overlapping our time creating a loop... Sort of." Chas explained.  
I nodded realising what was going on. The little boy was my son. I had a son called Danny with Chas... The rest I didn't know.  
"He is my son then he said he's paying for my sins..." I looked away unable to think my son was in Hell because of me.  
"Sarah it's bad news. You... There's a shadow on your brain the doctors think it's a tumour"  
"Cancer?" I asked terrified at the very idea. How could this be happening?  
John just looked at me with those big brown eyes, the kind of eyes that could melt any soul.  
"Is it cancer?" I asked again.  
"They don't know Sarah, but they can't operate." Chas filled in.  
"What do you mean they can't operate, they need to do a biopsy"  
John shook his head pain in his beautiful eyes.  
"The shadow is on your cerebral cortex they can't operate Sarah there are just too many nerves"  
I just looked at him, straight at him then I looked through him I saw hell. I knew that was exactly where I was going, fire and brimstone and all that shit.  
I closed my eyes blocking out my emotions I felt a hand take mine. Chas. My eyes remained closed I had to tell him he was my son's father. He needed to know.  
"Chas. You're his father." I stated. My eyes remained closed.  
"His name is Danny Kramer and you're his father. You have to help him"  
My eyes snapped open as I felt his lips upon mine. His soft moist lips took away all of my pain.  
John just stood in the corner obviously extremely confused. Chas took my hand again smiled at me and sighed.  
"I don't know what's going on here Sarah, I don't know why I feel like I've know you all my life and I don't know how this happened but I promise you I will save him. No, we will save him together."


	4. Secrets of the Rock

Secrets of the Rock

_So this is just a little clip from a book Sarah has found. It's short and i'll get the next chapter up soon. I cant put the full version up and it had some pictures in it so if u want the full version either e-mail me or submit a review asking for it and i'll send it to u via e-mail.  
In the description it says "hope of becoming..." This just means the next part isn't readable just adding a little bit of suspense for you guys!_

_please R&R!_

* * *

**Trimer's Rock.**

Satan's secret device. One of the most evil devices know to man. It creates a portal. Allows the past to see the future and vice versa. Our only hope of peace is to destroy this device. The devil wants it back and wont stop until he has it. To transport yourself from one plane of existence to that same plane at a different time could have catastrophic effects. It is out duty as the guardians of the rock to destroy the devils only hope of becoming...

_Anyone reading this must have found the rock. Destroy it before it is too late. Do not use it. He will find you. Be safe, the fate of our world lies in your hands.

* * *

_

So this was the truth. The devise my son had used was the devil's. Was this why he was in hell? I needed more information... I needed to see my son.


	5. Questions

**AN: **Yeah I know I said I would have this up soon and haven't updated in months and I do apologise But I really did run out of imagination! cptn-jacks-bonnie-lass has practically forced me into writing this so jacy this is for you be grateful! Sorry it's short could have put it and the next chapter up as one longer chap but I wanted to give you something after having ignored it for so long! 

It was impossible to concentrate on only one thing. My brain, my son and this rock. The devil's secret device.  
I was loaded up with all my pain relief tablets and discharged myself from the white prison.  
John was taking me to see Papa Midnite. He knew everything but whether or not he would help was another story. He was neutral or so he said. But by keeping us in the dark he was allowing evil to win to take my son, to have John, to take me.  
Danny, my son had said Chas was in heaven. That means he is dead in the future. If he's dead and I'm dying our son will have no one. In the future I'm alive... Maybe it isn't cancer.  
We need more info. All we know is that Danny is Chas and my son.  
He's in hell for something I did. Chas is dead and Danny has possession of Trimer's Rock, or does he? Has Lucifer already claimed it? After all Danny is in hell the devil could just take it. My head was bursting with all this information, I had no idea what to think.

I felt Chas take my hand, he was a huge comfort to me but another one of my troubles. Why did we feel like this? We barley knew one another. When was I to conceive our child? Had any of these events changed the future? Now that we knew about Danny would everything still happen the way it was supposed to? How could we know? It was impossible.  
I had a child with Chas who I had met yesterday and was now in love with.  
I had a tumour in my brain which could very well kill me... It was bullshit! This wasn't supposed to happen EVER!  
"Sarah." He said softly.  
"Yeah." I asked looking up.  
"You okay"  
"No"  
"You still in pain"  
"A little"  
"Can I get you anything"  
"Chas"  
"Yeah"  
"I don't understand"  
"Neither do i"  
"Chas"  
"Yeah"  
"In the future you're dead"  
"I know"  
"I can't... I can't start something if you... If we both die and leave our son"  
"You're not gonna die Sarah"  
"But you are"  
Chas looked away letting go of my hand.  
I knew exactly what he was feeling because I was feeling it too. We were both condemned to death, well he was. I didn't know what would happen with me. I didn't know if this would go away by itself, or if I still had it when our son was sent to hell.  
"Sarah we need to see Midnite"  
I nodded. I just felt so tired and weak. My head felt loads better but I could still feel that dull aching just behind my temple. How was I supposed to save my son feeling like this? What had I done to jeopardise his safety. He had said he was paying for my sins. What had I done? Why had Chas died? When would all of this happen? The questions rattled around my brain causing me more discomfort than was necessary.  
I closed my eyes hoping Midnite would be able to answer some of my queries, lift a little weight from my shoulders and ease my aching heart.


	6. Crystal Ball

Chapter 6 Crystal Ball

**AN:** Again i'm sorry about the lack of update's and the shortness but i'm working on all my other stuff and well I actually KNOW what i'm doing with them! As you can see from this chap i've kinda formed a plan so that's always good right! I'm not gonna be able to update this story until after I get back from Italy... Soz guys I wanna try and get another chap of influence up first. Ok reviews would be much appreciated :D

"John, you've been absent some time." Midnite said gently looking the man up and down.

"Ah I see now. Lung cancer."

John sniggered.

"Always the sensitive one Midnite. We need your help, this is Sarah..." John said pointing to me.

Midnite's eyes widened.

"John I am neutral! You know this, I cannot help you with the information you seek."

"Midnite, she's desperate. Her kid..."

"I know John. You want information on Trimer's Rock. This is a dangerous topic, SHE has already endangered us all."

"What?" I asked nervously afraid of his answer.

"You gave the boy the rock. You sought that which was never meant to be found and you used it to gain that which is most important to you."

"I don't understand."

"No, you wouldn't. You have a tumour. You couldn't use the rock, it would have finished you off. So instead you sent your son."

"To do what?"

"Save his father."

My eyes widened. Shit. This was all falling into place.  
Chas is dead in the future and I couldn't save him so I sent Danny to do it for me...  
But Lucifer must have known that the rock was in use.

"So all of this IS my fault then."

"Correct."

"Midnite!" John interrupted.

"So where is the boy then?" Midnite asked referring to Chas.

"I didn't want him to come." John replied his face softening slightly.

"John you cannot protect him... He will die. Sarah's attempts at saving him have failed. Instead she has played straight into Lucifer's hands."

"What the fuck are you talking about?" John asked irritably.

"Lucifer has the rock John. He can travel backwards and forwards through time as he pleases... I shouldn't be telling you this but at this point in time evil is ahead of you so..."

Midnite took a deep breath.

If he told John he would change the path the future would take, he would have to deal with whatever consequences that brought.

"You die John. The lung cancer takes you... But before this happens you perform a selfless act and in doing so you save Sarah..."

"What selfless act?" John asked.

"That I cannot reveal. Please John just listen. You go to Heaven and all is good. Sarah falls pregnant and a baby is born. However, the tumour returns, there is nothing anyone can do. After your death Chas took up your position of maintaining the balance, he dies at the hands of a particularly nasty shadow demon. Sarah may have had the best intentions at heart all she wanted was for her son to have at least one parent... And that would not be her. She found the rock and sent her son to warn Chas. He wasn't supposed to come this far back but that must be due to Lucifer. John he will do everything in his power to stop you from getting into heaven."

"Fuck." John cursed.

I took a deep breath.

"You have to tell us the selfless act! If you do we can save John!"

"I've already told you too much." Midnite replies rising to his feet.

"John keep your eyes and ears open. Lucifer will stop at NOTHING to prevent your salvation."

"I bet he won't." John grumbled turning to leave.

* * *

"What did he say?" Chas asked when we reached the cab.

"He said we're all gonna die." John replied seriously, lighting a cigarette.

"Seriously?"

"Yep."

"Fuck."

"Fuck indeed." John agreed taking a long drag.

"What about Danny?"

"The kids screwed. Lucifer has him and the rock and I'm willing to bet my life he won't let either of them go."

"JOHN!" I said warningly.

"It's true."

I sighed. He was so right. It was true. Danny was screwed, John was screwed, Chas was screwed and I was screwed. We were all screwed.


End file.
